Stephen Paul Reynolds, born March 5, 1951, passed away peacefully from complications of diabetes the day after celebrating his 75th birthday. Steve was many things: talented creative, soccer fanatic, member of Mountain Rise United Church of Christ, Type 1 diabetic, table tennis maven, hopeless romantic, avid cyclist, stalwart enforcer of the University of Rochester’s logo standards, dog lover, softball player, and – thanks, in part, to his advocacy for LGBTQ rights – a man widely hailed as “the coolest straight guy you’ll ever meet.”
But above all, Steve was a parent.
For Steve, “parent” was not a title bestowed upon the birth of a child; it was something earned by choosing, over and over, to love someone different than you, simply because they needed it. Steve devoted his life to parenting as a youth group leader at Mountain Rise, as a coach on numerous sports teams, as “Mister Steve” to the kids on Da Vinci Drive, and as an uncle to his nieces and nephews in the Reynolds and Dwyer families, who inspired his life-defining choice to be a father to Emma and Conor. That choice set a precedent at the University of Rochester, where Steve fought hard to become the first person to take paternity leave. Steve’s immense legacy is how those he parented have chosen to be a leader, make a difference, and treat others as they wish to be treated.
A celebration of Steve’s life will be held on Saturday, March 28 at 1:00 PM at Mountain Rise UCC (2 Mountain Rise, Fairport, NY, 14450). If you wish to honor Steve, you can contribute to the American Diabetes Association, perform a random act of kindness for someone you don’t know, or, if you were one of the many people parented by him, simply be the kind of person he raised you to be.
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Steve was a brother-in-law and a friend to me. He deserved every word of his beautiful obituary.
Uncle Steve will always be remembered for his jokes, smiles, and words of encouragement. He will be greatly missed.
Our sincere condolences to Steve’s family, particularly Conor and Emma
He was known as Uncle Funny to our children. Sending much love ❤️
Steve we will miss you. From the beautiful eulogy you son wrote for all of us I am so impressed with his life. He was a force for change and love.
I’m very sorry for your loss. Best to your entire family.
Connor, I’m so sorry for your loss. Your dad sounds like he was a very impressive man and I know you and your family will miss him dearly.
Thinking of you,
Ken
I am so sorry for your loss. I am Praying for Peace and Comfort for you and the whole family 🙏🏾💙🙏🏾
Conor is one of my best friends and I know so much of what I see in Conor is also part of what came from his dad.
Love and Blessing from the Beckfords
Con:
My condolences on the loss of your father. He sounds like someone i would have really enjoyed meeting. I hope your happy memories of times spent with him help to ease your loss.
Kathleen
My condolences. May his memory be a blessing to your family.
Steve was a great individual who raised many amazing kids, not just his own. He will be missed by so many people!
Here’s a message that strikes a gentle balance — acknowledging the long passage of time, honoring your history, and offering sincere sympathy without overstepping. You can adjust the tone depending on how close you feel to the family now.
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Option 1: Warm and Simple
Dear [Name/Family],
I was very saddened to hear of [his] passing. Even though many years have gone by, I have always remembered our time together and your family’s kindness. Please accept my heartfelt condolences, and know that my thoughts are with all of you during this difficult time.
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Option 2: Respectful and More Formal
To the [Family Name] Family,
I wish to extend my sincere condolences on the loss of [his name]. Although it has been many years since our lives were connected, I have never forgotten the years we shared or the warmth of your family. I hope you find comfort in your memories and in one another.
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Option 3: Brief but Meaningful
To the Reynolds Family:
I was very saddened to hear of Steve’s passing. Even though many years have gone by, I have always remembered our time together and your family’s kindness. Please accept my heartfelt condolences, and know that my thoughts are with all of you during this difficult time.
Mary Lynch
I am so sorry for your loss. Your dad sounds like a great dad and an overall great guy. Thoughts to you and your family.
Steve hired me at UofR and was the closest I’ve had to a professional mentor. His advice and creativity taught me a lot, and his racquetball skill continually humbled my younger self. He fought his condition with tenacity and would not let it stop him from leading a full life. You’ve earned your rest. Peace.
Steve was a source of joy and optimism, creativity, standards, and humor. I got to know Steve when we went to New Orleans after Katrina to do relief work with our church. Without making a big deal out of it, Steve quietly taught me the challenges involved in living a full, meaningful life with severe diabetes. His tenacity at riding the Tour de Cure every year, his very funny and self-effacing jokes, his creativity, and his willingness to do anything for anyone in need were inspirational to me. He joined the choir just to try something different, admitting, „I don‘t know how to sing!“ We shared the ironic hilarity of having each broken our hips and legs at the same time in ridiculous ways. I am heartbroken at his loss. We were all truly blessed by Steve‘s life. I will miss his laugh, his smile, and simply stated, I will miss him.
Conor and Emma, Losing a parent is so hard, and I’m sending love and strength to you both. I knew Steve when you lived on Alaimo, and also professionally: Steve (UR) and I (RIT) were both in the print production business. I remember him as a kind man with a good sense of humor. You are both wonderful people, and I know Steve is a big part of that.
Connor, I was very sad to hear this news. How fortunate you were to have him as your father, and how lucky were so many others to have him influence and guide their lives. Praying for God’s comfort to your family today and in the weeks ahead. Glenn